We Are FuQed
A pig farmer, a Citigroup exec, and the GOP walk into a bar…
Several months ago I began writing about Qanon and the ridiculous conspiracies to which these adherents, well, adhere. JFK, Jr never having died in a plane crash. That he is actually alive, well, and ready to reappear as Trump’s 2020 running mate. That a cabal of Satan worshipping Democrats secretly run a global child sex ring in which the children are constantly scared into producing adrenochrome which is harvested from their veins and ingested. That the likes of Tom Hanks, Ellen, Oprah, the Clintons are all part of — hell, as far as Qanon goes, all of Hollywood are pedophiles getting juked up on kiddie blood. And, of course, the hero of their fairy tales, Trump, leading the charge against the Deep State and this heinous sex trafficking ring.
Oh, and the more recent addition of Wayfair being an online portal at which you can purchase a really expensive storage cabinet which will contain your very own abducted child. Ahhh, technology. Not even Jeff Bezos has that available via Amazon Prime.
When I first wrote about these things, I received a lot of email from readers who had never heard of Q or the Qanonsensical garbage of which I was writing. Fast forward to recent weeks in which these dumbfuqs have gone mainstream as they have been embraced by the GOP, and everyone now knows about them.
For those still catching up, Q is a mysterious guy who began posting on the boards at 4Chan in 2017. He claimed to be a high ranking intelligence official with access to Trump’s secret fight against these horrid forces like the Pope and the Dalai Lama (yes, they include them in their mental ratfuQery). Q was kicked off 4Chan and migrated to the even more sewer based internet hole, 8Chan. 8Chan basically being a colostomy bag of conspiracy theories and incels. When 8Chan was shuttered by Cloudflare, Q moved over to the newly created 8kun.
Releasing regular “Q drops” to the wetbrained followers, Q slowly began to fold in 9/11 truthers, anti-vaxxers, birthers, UFO lovers, and flatearthers. All are welqome, all are welqome. Q-nited we stand, as it were. Anyone seen Qarolanne?
And because real life is just too boring for so many folk, the ranks of the rank grew. That feeling of belonging to something BIG, something not everyone knows about, being an insider. Oooooooo, Q the James Bondian music.
These low IQanon followers percolated down in the bowels of the internet for years, until they recently began being courted by the GOP, the large fail sons — Eric and Jr, and the lowest IQanon of them all — Rancid J Blowhole, himself. With more than a wink and a nod, they have actively begun playing to this band of misfits, which considering their own base is dwindling, makes sense. Gather ye crackpots rosebuds while ye may, and all.
What these cretins in power do not understand, is that while they are insulated from this buffoonery by security, wealth, privilege, and distance — those of us out here in the real world must deal with the very real consequences of their growing and emboldened numbers. Oregon authorities have been begging the public to only listen to official sources for information after Qanon members began spreading their latest conspiracy cream cheese that antifa is responsible for setting all the fires and encouraging vigilante justice.
Reality plays no part in their minds and confronting them with facts is meaningless. Q has predicted, for years, mass arrests of these cabal members on exact dates. Never happens. Q predicted a certain number of seats that would be won by the GOP in 2018. Uh huh, sure.
Yet despite the easily provable bullshit quality of the entire enterprise, it has not only sustained, but grown. Q Facebook groups with upwards of 100,000 each — a recent study by Facebook revealed MILLIONS of followers of Q pages and private groups. An app you can buy where Q drops are automatically delivered to your phone when they happen. Nearly 150,000 Q related accounts on Twitter — that does not include the countless personal accounts who boldly declare their membership.
That the GOP has climbed into bed with them is just another nail in the coffin of that entire party. Aligning with the dimmest, conspiracy loving, fuQwits is simply par for the course for them these days.
Earlier this year a council woman in California incorporated Q rants in her public address and ended with “God Bless Q.” Multiple people who embrace Qanon have been running for office across the country, including a batshit woman in Georgia, Marjorie Taylor Greene, who is all but a shoo-in for a seat in Congress now. Completely, openly immersed in Qanon and completely embraced by Trump who called her a “future Republican star.” Last month he called Q followers “people who love our country.” His convicted former National Security advisor, Mike Flynn, posted a video over 4th of July weekend in which he and family members recited a generic oath of office and ended with the phrase “Where we go one, we go all” — the dumfuQ national Scrabble bag of — WWG1WGA.
But back to the original line of this piece…
A pig farmer, a Citigroup exec, and the GOP walk into a bar…
It does sound like the perfect set up for a joke, but it is not funny. In recent days, it appears Q and its support system has been tracked down and outed. And *shock* there is no high ranking intelligence official at the steering wheel of this runaway asylum.
A couple days ago, the largest clearinghouse of Q related rubbish (10 million visitors per month) quickly shutdown when the operator was found to be a man in New Jersey. Jason Gelinas, an information security analyst for Citicorp, was outed. He quickly scrubbed the website and the app he ran — Armor of God (not kidding). Citicorp has not yet made a statement. Jason, when approached outside his home, refused to comment other than to call Q a “patriotic movement to save the country.”
Uh huh.
Now it appears that the mental gruel behind Q may very well be this man:
Jim Watkins, a former Army helicopter mechanic, who now resides in the Philipines. Back in 1987 the Army sent him to computer school in Virginia. Cue his first foray into the internet, while still enlisted, as a purveyor of pornography and offensive content. A former associate called him the “king of porn” — yep, totally get that vibe off him … insert eye roll and loss of every bit of moisture in my nethers.
He is a pig farmer and the owner of both the original 8Chan and developer of Q’s latest home, 8kun which is hosted through Russian servers — the only ones who will have him. He also is the owner of the domain (QMap.pub) where the above mentioned Q drops were hosted by good ol’ Jason up above.
As I said, for a while it was an obscure nuisance, and those of us who knew about it rolled our eyes and went on with our business. But now their business is infecting people everywhere. Joining up with Plandemic believers, anti-maskers, and every easily led, wide eyed goof who cannot handle the realities of the world as they are and must find some even more sinister stories to keep them awake at night.
And what’s more sinister than child sex trafficking and the cannibalization of little children? Of course no one likes that. Of course any decent person would want to stop that. Which is why you get suburban moms and grandmas flocking to Q, falling down the internet rabbit holes, losing friends and family as they profess to be the only ones to know the truth.
A recent news story about an anti-mask rally in St. George, Utah even has Grandma spouting that Q line about child molesters loving mask wearing.
I need you to watch this immediately so we can discuss.
Please. pic.twitter.com/Ta0bh5BxS2
— Yashar Ali 🐘 (@yashar) September 14, 2020
This has to be stopped.
There have always been contingents of people in this country for whom reality holds no sway. They prefer to trade in secrets, conspiracies, wild ideas. But until now, when an orange faced farce has 40% of the population writing off anything they don’t like as FAKE NEWS; when this same Bozo the Assclown spreads his own version of reality culled from the deepest nooks and crannies of his own asshole; when an entire segment of the populace is completely immune to facts — we were able to marginalize them, walk a circle around them to avoid them. Now they have been mainstreamed by a national political party intent on wooing them with attention, swaying their vote by making them feel seen, and encouraging their violent behavior by embracing instead of decrying their beliefs.
A pig farmer, a Citigroup exec, and the GOP walk into a bar…
And the United States was fuQed.
Not a great punchline, but then there is nothing funny about where this is headed.
